OLIVE THE WORKSHOP DOG

It always amazes me how Olive (the workshop Labrador) seems to know who has just entered the workshop without seeing them. She is particularly good at knowing the difference between the ‘I’ve come to read the meter’ opening door and the ‘just popping in to see what you’ve got at the workshop’ opening door.

She was very good at spotting the ‘dodgy geezer trying to sell me dodgy CDs’ opening door sound. In fact, it was more a case of opening door sound, charge, woof woof, growl, sound of door closing. Me going to see what the fuss was. Sound of me telling dodgy geezer to go away. Sound of patting Olive on the head – ‘Good girl’.

When she gets older I may bring her to the shop and train her to tell the difference between the ‘I’m going to buy something’ shop bell and the ‘I’m going to prod everything and say I could get it cheaper at the car bootie’ shop bell.

Woof!

TURBO TROUBLES

Last week the turbo on our little van packed up. The garage loaned us a transit van while they repaired it. In an attempt to offset the impending garage bill, we decided that perhaps we should fill the transit with furniture and try and sell it at an Antiques fair (which, by huge freak of nature, was on at the same time and we’d already decided to go).

So, on Monday morning we find ourselves, after a 3am start, attempting to sell stuff to the trade. I seem to remember bemoaning the fact that when we are out buying, we are often outbid by the Japanese shippers. Well, having sold a load of gear to them and being paid in nice, new, crisp £50 notes, I can see the attraction of chasing that particular market!

Of course, having received a large amount of cash early on, Kathryn and myself took the dubious business decision to go and blow it on some lovely stuff for the shop. So, coming to the shop very soon; loads of old tobacco tins, loads of old kilner jars, clockmakers cabinets, enamel signs, metal planters and, of course, more cupboards, tables, chairs and other lovely things.

DREADNOUGHT

As if I wasn’t busy enough, I’ve set myself the task of building a dreadnought for the Artists’ Marquee here at Burwash in July (in association with Open Studios!). If I manage to finish it on time then, post exhibition, we’re going to find a space in the shop to create some sort of ‘battleship’ display...Kathryn can’t wait.... (unless, of course, it sells – although I usually end up keeping all the large ships I make – they’re like children but quieter and requiring less dusting).

p.s. I really did this blog to see what picture Kathryn would shoehorn into it!

LLOYD LOOM SOFA

We have never seen an original loom sofa in all our years dealing...well, until now! We now have one in the shop, form 1938; it’s a really beautiful shape. We’ve painted it grey to give it a slightly more contemporary feel and it looks great...even just for displaying our cushions on!

SALESPERSON OF THE WEEK

An odd one, this. The phone rings –

“Hello, Nest”
“Hi. I had a load of stuff I was going to bring over to you to sell, but I sold it all to another dealer – sorry.”

“Right, good, well done! Err..bye”.
“Bye.”

We award this person salesperson of the week – if anyone else wants to phone us up to tell us they sold a lot of things to another dealer...well...perhaps don’t bother?!

CAR BOOT SALE

I was at a car boot, selling, the other Sunday (a general build up of domestic and workshop stuff). I hadn’t ‘done’ a car boot for about 10 years so it was great fun catching up with the experience. It did give me the chance to sharpen up my haggling skills. Normally I use them to buy, but I was on the other side of the fence, this time.

Trouble is, I don’t haggle in the shop so I think I may have offended a few buyers with my ‘robust’ style!
One guy asked “how much for the desk, mate?”
“Tenner” I said.
“Would you take 8?” he replied.
“No, a tenner’s fair”.
“Yeah, but I want a deal” he said.
So I replied “Right, I want 15 for the desk”.
He went quiet and then said “What about a tenner?”
“Done.”

This was my general philosophy the whole day. A rather irritated lady wanted to buy a child’s chair.
“How much?” she said.
“Tenner” I replied.
“What about 7?”
“No.”
“What about 8?”
“No.”
“Oh, come on, last offer – how about 9?”
“No.”
“You’re not very nice, are you?”
“10 quid is a bargain for that”, I said.
“Well, I’m going to think about it” she replied.
“You’re going to think about a quid?” I said.

She thought about it for five seconds and gave me the tenner. She broke the basic haggling rule. She kept her feet pointing at the chair the whole time, which means she wants it.... Still, she could have done a handstand and sung the national anthem – it was still going to cost her a tenner!

And, by the way, last offer should always be your last offer. If it isn’t – don’t say it!

SALESPERSON OF THE WEEK

I award myself ‘Salesperson of the Week’ for presiding over the worst Tuesday of the year so far. I immediately sacked myself at the end of the day. Unfortunately, I was re-employed the next day and made to sand things at the workshop all day as punishment.

Obviously this award is erring on the side of sarcastic....